Some Bragging and a Few Confessions

So to balance out last week's Naughty Post, I'll warn you - I'm totally going to brag in this one. And I am 100% biased so pay no mind. My boy falls well within the range of normal, but to me, he's awesome. (THIS HAS NEVER HAPPENED BEFORE TO ANY MOTHER.) Plus I never did post a two-years update on his recent achievements, so here it is:

Flat-out Brags (and A Few Confessions):

• Brag: He said "Mississippi" perfectly as we crossed that river on the way home from Iowa for Thanksgiving.

Jude in Iowa with my cousins' kids, Asher and Devin

• Brag: He can pull off a purple shirt with green overalls better than anyone I know.

• Brag: He pronounces the Danish words for Grandpa and Grandma perfectly during our stay at my grandparents' house. My grandma is Danish and that's who they are to Jude (Bedstemor and Bedstefor)

Jude with his Bedstemor

• Brag: He is very tidy. When he was a baby, if a microscopic drop of rice cereal landed on his tray rather than in his mouth, he would meticulously dab at it with his finger until it disappeared. Once I watched him throw a ball behind one of our stereo speakers, slide the speaker to the side to get it, then carefully slide it back into place (why thank you son). The other day he and Jono were playing "Daddy Get You", where Jono chases Jude around the house and tackles him. Jude suddenly halted mid-flight near the dining room table, alarmed by the sight of a chair that wasn't pushed all the way in after we had eaten. He carefully slid it back into place, then continued his rampage around the house.
  

• Brag: He counted to ten for the first time three days before his birthday. Technically this lets me tell him, far off in the future, that he could count when he was one. Sorta.

I got this off the internet

• Confession: He's obsessed with boobies. He walks up to me and honks them whenever he wants, then proudly says "Boobie". He also pats them appreciatively and says, "Pillow". Cute now, but will need to curb it in the future.
  

• Brag: He likes to compare body parts. When I'm getting him ready for bed, he points out my freckles, then points to the freckle he has on his foot. (He says "fweckle" while he does this. For heavens' sake Jude.) He likes to show me his Boopus and then make me show him mine. He points out my chest and then asks Daddy why he doesn't have those. He looks for them on himself as well and is disappointed.

• Brag: When he's mildly bored he likes to name all of the animals and people he knows. He'll rattle off ten to twenty names, including the uncles he rarely sees (Tyler, Bett, Gant, Joel, Jessie, Ella, Mona, Giraffe, El-phant, Doggy, Kitty, Gamma, Bapa...)

Probably dismantling a parental conspiracy...

• Brag: Nothing gets by him. NOTHING. We will need to learn a second language soon.

• Confession: One time I asked him for a kiss and he said sweetly, "Okay Mommy." Then when I leaned in he smacked me on the cheek. I'm telling myself he was not being cruel, it's just that he has a warped sense of humor and was feeling spontaneous. Right?

• Brag: He sings now, kind of, though not in tune.

• Brag: His memory is scarily accurate and long-lived. We walked by an ice cream shop one evening that we had gone to months before in the summer, only in the daylight. He attempted to climb the stairs under cover of darkness saying, "ice keam, ice keam, ice keam" frantically. We saw five minutes of G-Rap's Santa Claus parade over a week ago and he was still talking about it as we decorated the tree. "Santa Kaus? Reindea'? Machin' Band? Too loud. I waved."

• Confession: He is extremely contrary right now. He's like one of those independent voters who hate whichever political party is in power at any given time, or a hipster that only thought Indian headbands were cool when he was the sole person wearing one.

"Eyes"

• Brag: He's beginning to know some of his colors. He can point out blue, green, yellow, and sometimes red. He likes to color, but only if I sit by him and continually draw "eyes". He likes to tell me exactly where to put my two little dots, and he doesn't have time for me to draw the rest of the face before he wants another pair of just eyes somewhere else on the page. Our artwork lately looks like a 50's housewife's apron.

• Brag: Alongside the naughty, he can be heart-breakingly sweet. He gives kisses and asks for hugs voluntarily, says, "Bye Daddy. I love you." when Jono leaves, asks if you're okay if it looks like you fell down or are fake-crying about something, and asks his toy dinosaurs the same question if he drops them. He always reaches for me, then lays his head on my shoulder whenever I sing to him before bed.

• Just weird: His favorite book right now is "Go Dog, Go!" When we get to the page where three dogs are having a party in a boat, he always points to the dog playing checkers and says, "No doggy! No! Don't do dat." I tell him the doggy isn't doing anything wrong. He looks at me incredulously and doesn't believe it.

So there's the two-year update, heavy on the trumping up of Jude. The grandparents won't mind.